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Navigating Holiday Trauma Triggers: A Starter's Guide to Inner Child Healing



The holiday season is hopefully filled with joy and festivities. The reality is that it can be a very challenging time for those navigating conversations with difficult family members and on a journey of childhood trauma recovery. The added pressure to be "festive" often leads to compounded feelings of shame, sadness, anger, and the like. Certain people, places, and things can trigger feelings and trauma from the past, often our childhoods. I promise you, it does not always have to be this way.


Coping skills for stress such as mindfulness, breathwork, journaling, exercise, and good sleep routines can greatly help buffer the spikes in holiday stress. Inner child healing adds another layer to this process, emphasizing the importance of tending to the wounded aspects of ourselves. In this article, we'll explore the synergy of trauma recovery and inner child healing, offering practical tips to foster understanding and maintain compassion and self-care during holiday gatherings that you choose to participate in.

  1. Acknowledge Your Inner Child: Before engaging in family interactions, acknowledge the presence of your inner child and other younger parts of yourself. The younger, more vulnerable part of you may be triggered during holiday conversations. Treat this inner child with compassion and recognize that their feelings are valid. Inner child healing involves addressing and nurturing these wounded aspects of yourself.

  2. Set Loving Intentions for Inner Child Healing: In addition to setting positive intentions for interactions, extend that intention towards your inner child. Imagine creating a safe and nurturing space for them during family gatherings. Using your imagination, invite those parts to relax, play, and be taken care of by an ever-present nurturing figure while your adult self interacts with other family members that are difficult to get along with. This mindfulness practice sets the stage for healing and empowers you to respond to challenging situations with greater self-compassion.

  3. Communicate with the Language of the Inner Child: As you express your thoughts and feelings, consider using language that resonates with your inner child. This might involve simplifying complex emotions and expressing yourself in a way that feels accessible and comforting to the younger you. This conscious communication bridges the gap between your adult self and your inner child.

  4. Engage in Inner Child Visualization: Take moments for inner child visualization, especially if emotions become overwhelming. Close your eyes and visualize your younger self in a safe and comforting space. This technique provides a soothing anchor during challenging conversations, allowing you to stay connected with your own nurturing presence. Verbally guide yourself, 'I see my younger self in a cozy, safe place. This is my sanctuary. It's a sunny afternoon, and I can feel the warmth around me.'

  5. Practice Self-Soothing Techniques: Incorporate self-soothing techniques into your communication strategy. This could involve gentle touch, deep breathing, or repeating affirmations that provide comfort to your inner child. These practices serve as reminders that you have the capacity to comfort and care for yourself, even in challenging situations. For instance, you might say, 'I'm going to take a moment to breathe and remind myself that I am safe. Everything will be okay.'"

  6. Engage in Inner Child Visualization with Time and Place Orientation: Take moments for inner child visualization, especially if emotions become overwhelming. Close your eyes and connect your younger self to your safe and comforting space. Look at your hands and feet and notice that you are an adult with autonomy, a voice, choices, and you have air in your lungs. Notice how tall you are as an adult and that your job as an adult is to protect and take sweet care of your inner child. Notice all of the senses in your present moment such as what you see, hear, smell, taste, and touch.

  7. Create Boundaries that Protect the Inner Child: When establishing boundaries, consider their impactn your inner child. Boundaries become a protective shield, ensuring that your younger self feels safe and secure. Communicate these boundaries with the understanding that they contribute to your overall well-being and inner child healing. For instance, you might say to yourself or a trusted support person, 'I'm going to take a moment to take a break and breathe. I am capable of of feeling OK and safe."

  8. Celebrate Inner Child Milestones: As you navigate challenging family conversations, celebrate the milestones in your inner child healing journey. Recognize moments where you responded with love and compassion, and acknowledge the growth you've achieved. Celebrating these milestones reinforces the positive changes you're making in your relationship with your inner child.


Navigating holiday conversations with difficult family membersas you heal from childhood trauma are interconnected processes that require a compassionate and intentional approach. By embracing the transformative synergy of these practices, you not only contribute to your own healing but create a space for authentic connections within your family dynamic. Remember, this journey is a continual process of growth, self-discovery, and building resilience, fostering a holiday season filled with understanding, connection, and inner child healing.


Working with a licensed therapist trained in trauma recovery and healing attachment wounds of childhood is a wonderful way to create a partnership in your healing journey. Contact ewilcox@wilcoxwellness.com to learn more about how you can heal inner child hurt and feel more empowered in your present, adult self.




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